It's been a few months now that I've been using the Krankcycle in my rehab process in the hopes of retaining some amount of cardio fitness for when I can finally (fingers crossed) get back to some version of running. There is still a looooooong road ahead of me but in terms of using this unique arm bike machine I thought I'd give a little progress report or at least my opinion of it.

The Krankcycle is actually an invention of one Mr. Johnny G (check out Krankcycle.com) who in the fitness world is a kind of guru in that he was also behind the hugely popular spin bikes and started the whole spin class movement. Well, he took the same idea behind his bikes (a dial to adjust the tension level) and applied it to an upper body workout. It builds off of the more standard UBE Machine (arm bikes that are used in rehabilitation commonly for older people or those unable to use anything below their waists...looks like I now fall into that category!) but differs in that it is much more versatile. You can adjust of course the tension level, the same as you can on a typical UBE, but you can also lift the height of the arm cranks so you can vary which sets of upper body muscles you target. You can further flip the pedals around and then cycle in either a forward or backward motion; neat if you want a change of pace. Finally, if you are able to use your legs the seat does come out and you can stand; the layout of the Krankcycle also encourages you to sit up straight (some UBE machines have a back and you can slouch back) and this works and tones your core. So, my first assessment was that it was indeed much more progressive and advanced than a typical arm bike.

That being said, there was still a period of getting adjusted to the machine and how it works. This goes for any kind of exercise machine that you choose to use in your fitness routines but especially being that I was a runner and not used to using solely my arms for cardio work it took a little longer to get used to. I first tried the UBE machines and will admit that because muscularly my arms were weaker I had a hard time generating enough power to get my heart rate into what I had wanted to be my target zone (or being able to go as long as I would have like!). Still, over time I got used to the motions and that alone made me improve and I could extend the amount of time on the machine; by the time I then switched over to the Krankcycle I still had to tweak my form and propulsion a bit but when I finally 'got it' I must say I was able to get in a good cardio effort.

On Johnny G's website he notes that the science behind the Krankcycle is still evolving and there are lots of tests that are still being done. For instance they aren't sure how getting in cardio work sans any lower extremities will translate to fitness levels when you then go back to running. They also aren't sure on exactly how many calories per say the machine burns; if it has a similar amount compared to other cardio machines or not. They do note that obviously because the arms are a smaller muscle group it will be less, but that you are able to elevate your heart rate enough so that it still is excellent exercise. One study from the American Council for Exercise estimated it burned about 9 calories per minute on average during one of the Krankcycle classes, think a spinning class but with these upper arm bikes.

There is also the theory that because the arms are closer to the heart this machine is able to raise heart rate level faster than if you were doing lower body cardio work. In my experience I won't necessarily say I found that to be the case, but I will say that the potential to get your heart rate up there is definitely there. After I became acquainted with the motions I was able to incorporate interval workouts and tempo sort of efforts on the machine and I'll tell you I was definitely sweating, working hard, and my heart was pumping. By the end I will acknowledge I knew I put in a good effort. The only disadvantage I see is that because the arms are a smaller muscle group, and especially since mine are not as buffed as they could have been should I be say a rower, the amount of time I can go on the Krankcycle is significantly less than if I were running outside. But, for what I do I make sure it is high quality and with the intervals I know by the end I have stressed my cardio system and I feel good in that at least I am able to do SOMETHING to get my heart pumping. I had been, and still am, dying being stuck on this couch!! :P

Time will only tell how this kind of cardio workout will translate into getting back to running, or at least even on the elliptical, but I will say that being that I have no other options for cardio the Krankcylce is something I'd recommend to anyone else in a similar situation. As with anything, a major factor is how much effort you put into it and if that is there I believe I will be able to retain some amount of cardiovascular fitness. I know it won't be the same as where I was but it has to be better than nothing! ;)

Just a quick post today as I wanted to put out the second installment of the "Top 10 signs you know guys have taken over the house" (you can check out the first if you missed it!) and this one is "When the Front Room Stairs Become Shelves." Obviously once all the available floorspace as been covered there is no other place to house items but the stairs?!?! hehe. At any rate, I did want to let anyone who is interested in seeing the continuation of this series and other cartoon/art related material know that I will actually be moving it over to my Writing and Art Blog as I try to move back into the swing of things since my accident and use this Fitness Stop blog for the fun workout, sports, and health related tips and news.

So for all of those track junkies out there last night was another big step forward for American Distance running in that Chris Solinksy smashed the American Record in the 10,000 meter event down at Stanford. The race was stacked, pacers enlisted, and there was plenty talk of the potential falling of Meb Keflezighi's nine year old record of 27:13.98; but much of the attention was put on Galen Rupp as being the one to do it. This was in fact Solinsky's debut 10k and while he was fit one never really knows what to expect in their first attempt at a distance, especially among such a high caliber field. So when he did take the lead with 800 meters to go I'm sure many a track fans were surprised, cheering him on, but maybe still expecting him to fade or ultimately be overtaken in the end. But the very opposite was the case in he blazed home to win in 26:59.6, which not only established the new AR but crossed the elusive 27 minute threshold making him the fastest 10k harrier ever not of African descent. Not too shabby. :)

The race was so fast that Galen did still eclipse the previous American Record mark in finishing in fourth with 27:10.74. Just ahead of him in third was Sam Chelanga of Liberty who set the new NCAA record with 27:08.39. Also, one of Solinsky's training partners, Simon Bairu, represented Canadians well and with his 27:23.69 for fifth set the bar in the Canadian Record.

In the rest of the meet Shannon Rowbury drew some attention herself in winning the women's 5,000 meters, in which she is still relatively new to the event at usually sticking to the 1,500, as she upset current American Record holder Shalane Flanagan with 150 meters to go and finishing time of 15:00.51. Shalane came in at 15:04.23 and Amy Begley placed third by setting a PR for herself in 15:05.69. So it was quite an exciting night for distance running, and it actually comes off of a thrilling weekend being that the Oregon Relays in Eugene were the night before and Andrew Wheating had an amazing kick to win the 1,500 in 3:37.8.

All of this is quite inspiring and hopefully pumps everyone else up to set and achieve their own fitness goals whether it be in running or even just getting in a certain number of workouts a week. Seeing others achieve their own goals is something we can all look to as motivation. So on that note I hope you all had a great weekend, busted your own sweat even if it wasn't in a record setting attempt, and are looking forward to the start of another week!

the power of visualization and picturing yourself achieving your goals is something that i believe is quite remarkable at keeping you motivated to continuing on the path to reaching your dreams when things get tough or tedious. this is something i've not only heard plenty of successful individuals preach about but have experienced first hand as well. growing up i was always one with an active imagination (yes i had an imaginary friend 'hockey' who must have been quite a klutz being that he broke so many things!) and at a point when my daydreams turned from purely fantasy to perhaps things i envisioned myself achieving i continued on picturing me in the 'future' accomplishing what i set out to do or drawing encouragement from what i envisioned others having done and wanting to follow suit.

when i started competing in track and other running races i found this is something very common and in fact an integral part of training is in mental; you do have to come to the line with a certain degree of confidence in your own training and abilities or you take yourself out of the race before you even start. another aspect is that racing hurts...there is no two ways about it and when that burn does set in one of the best ways to keep pushing onward is to think about how great you will feel at the end should you achieve what you set out to do. this is true in nearly any other parallel; when things start to pile up and you are at the point of breaking what separates those who keep going from those who give up or at least give in and settle? yes, a part of it comes down to natural ability and even luck but a major factor is how much you believe in yourself and that will bring with it a certain amount of fortitude to keep working, keep digging deeper to bring that dream, that vision, to reality.

yes, it doesn't always happen; plenty of people line up in the same race and they all want to win, they all believe they have a shot but of course only one person will cross the line first. yet even though plenty more people may fail at winning that particular race if they continue to have faith in their cause, to still feel the hunger, the desire to pursue their own victories they will put their nose back to the grinding stone and have the courage to come back next time with an equal, or even greater, amount of belief and try again. and even if they didn't win perhaps that wasn't their goal; maybe it was a certain time they had set out to beat and they very well could have done that.

we all have races in our lives and some of them we can choose to enter in, the ones that mean the most to us, or instead dissuade ourselves from doing so because we don't believe it could ever happen. yet people who imagine themselves conquering those goals and picturing what 'could be,' have in my opinion a far greater shot in at least making it to the starting line of the race instead of passing up on it for the fact that it may seem too daunting and the chance of failure too great. and to keep on running and outlast the competition you must have an equal amount of imagination because continuing on in pursuit is even harder than just beginning. there will be obstacles and daily training and tasks will no doubt become tiring and tedious, sometimes even mundane; set backs will tempt you to give up but if you hold tight to the picture of the future you envision you will find the strength, the courage to look forward and put one foot in front of the other.

failure is also something that you will no doubt be met with, no one achieves their goals without having first failed at something; so do not think of it as a deterrent to continue on but perhaps just another barrier to cross or a veer in the course that you will overcome, adapt if necessary, and continue the race to the finish line.

as of late i feel like i'm being torn in a million different directions! i will liken it to a sort of tug-of-cait if u will. :) i've been sort of forced to take a break from lots of things and one of those things was work. i know i probably could be taking on more writing assignments at the moment but i had been spreading myself a bit thin up until his whole debacle and i think that while i'm physically having to take things easier i decided to not stress so much about the work front either. my main priority actually right now is to heal my leg and i want to do all i can to ensure my best odds for as full of a recovery as possible; that means this blasted right leg demands my focus for now. yes, bills and all that fun still are piling up, but even if this may sound very irresponsible i'm going to just try to push those worries to the back of my mind and think only of today.

at the same time i DO want to find something that i can still work on between PT and all so that so i feel like this down time has been productive in some way. i've then been mulling around various projects i'd like to channel my efforts. i have actually finished my second novel but am in the process of polishing that 'perfect' query letter to hopefully get a literary agent...but that is a lofty goal and who knows if that will ever work out. secondly i've been trying to do more cartoon endeavors and have been kicking around various ways to put that to use. between all of this i still feel directionless and unsure of what steps to take next. (haha...albeit steps with crutches!)

i still battle the niggling voice saying, "you're not doing anything, you're not moving towards a concrete goal" and that is both true and daunting. but i hope that in time a more definite aim will materialize and sometimes things have a surprising way of working out. so i will still keep putting my gimpy leg first, dabble in my various interests, and hold onto hope that things will be 'okay.'

Because i promised to color this in now i can say i've delivered! :) So i hope you have a little chuckle and you can see that i've turned it into a Mother's Day card at Pigspigot if you want to check that out. Sorry to keep this short but i'm off and i hope you all are having a good one!

as we go through life i think it's funny to think about the people who have remained in our lives for the long haul, as i like to put it. the people who you have stayed in touch with you through the various stages of your life and as you've moved on to different places. what is also funny to think about is that sometimes the easiest relationships to hold onto are the ones in which it is okay to have long lapses of contact but the second you do reconnect it is like no time has passed and also there is no love lost, or hard feelings. i'm notoriously horrible at getting back to people in a timely manner, and then at a certain point i start to feel so guilty at my flakiness that i then avoid the call back or reply message simply because i'm embarrassed. this only perpetuates the cycle and by the time i do finally talk to the person there is that awkward..."so, yea, sorry about not getting back to you sooner..."

still some of my favorite people, and the ones who i feel like i've been through so much with, whether it is hilarious inside jokes, shared war stories, and the people i can vent to without being afraid of sounding like a whiner or complainer are the same people who i have played infinite rounds of phone tag with (in essence we may both be a bit flaky!). still it is refreshing when we finally do connect because we are inevitably always picking up again without missing a beat, are still able to relate the same way we did years ago, and without having to always say it we know the other person cares a great deal about us.

what's also interesting is that the friendships that do end up lasting throughout our lives can be from surprising places. it may not be your best friend since grammar school (or it could be!) but instead a coworker who at the time you were friendly with but didn't envision growing that close too. and yet when things do get tough and we find ourselves in need of a person to help us through it, it is these people who step up. it then becomes clear who your real friends are and for that we need to be thankful and remember that when the time comes that they in turn may need a little help that they can rely on you.

i bring this up because recently i've been seeing the people that have continually been there for me and even if we haven't spoken for some time (or even remained in constant communication) it's nice to know they are there. and it's even better when we can just laugh at times past; there may be no greater thing than reminiscing about the most inane topics and of course when we ourselves were the ones making a fool of ourselves! it's laughter that really has helped me through really any hardship i've faced; i figure i'd rather laugh at myself than let the full wave of depression set in when things look bleak. and today i was blessed with perhaps one of the best surprises i've had in a while.

i don't know about you but i'm a total sucker for getting anything in the mail that isn't bills; cards, postcards, even a couple one liners...but the end all is of course the actual package! the feeling is sometimes something akin to christmas morning in ripping off that brown paper wrapping and digging through packing peanuts! :) and i got a package that really made me laugh; i mean i real good one. it was in fact from one of my best friends' moms (who is also someone i'd count as a close and dear friend...in fact i luv their whole flipping family! haha) and she was documenting to me the crazy and ridiculous things she sees and faces each and every day living with a family of not only guys, but runner guys, and also runner guys who are obsessed with junk food and video games. so she made me a little scrap book (pix included people!) of the most ridiculous things she deals with on a daily basis. what she probably would just laugh off or discredit herself with as not being that big of a deal was in fact that this was a HUGE deal to me; she took so much time, thought, and care in making this...and the best thing was it was freaking hilarious.

okay, so in all of this rambling there is another point i'm getting to here...the theme of the scrapbook is "10 signs a mom knows guys have taken over the house" and for each of her tenets i'm going to depict a fun little cartoon. we will make it a series; now i have the first couple inked out but have yet to color them in...but being that i want to kick this off with something i've posted the sketch for now and the finished version will be coming soon. so we can think of this as a preview of this little series. Today is: "The Toilet Seat is Always Left Up!" i hope you have a little laugh and more importantly i hope you acknowledge the people in your life that have proven to always be there for you...and i hope they are also the ones to make you laugh when you feel like you may be on the brink of letting that dark wave crash over and envelope you! haha

we can't change people. heck, it's tough enough to even change things we don't like about ourselves but that is at least possible. no, no matter how much we may hope, wish, and remiss over the fact that others will be apt to do their own things, make their own choices, and act as they may (that is in fact a good thing in that we all have free will!) and even though it may be painful to whom those actions affect that is just something we have to deal with. yes, we may wish that others will try to keep in mind our own feelings to a certain degree, but when it comes right down to it we can't make someone feel a certain way, act like we'd like, or even care.

that is easier said than done but it is i believe easier to at least accept when the person is not someone you care a great deal about. yes, if you were walking down the street and some stranger decided to pour their hot coffee in your face or tell you that you were ugly and they would like you to remove yourself from their sight that would probably cause some strong feelings (anger, irritation, etc.) but you'd move on, eventually forget about it (or at least recount it to friends and laugh it off) and you'd be not much worse for wear. it is instead when the actions, or inactions, of others cause us hurt and pain that last longer; they stay with you and they eat at you.

when there are people in your life that you've always expected they would be there for you, for who you made it clear you cared infinitely about, for whom you've shared so many good times with, and if they were struggling you were always there for them; at some level you come to then assume that the feelings were reciprocated. it is then disheartening to learn that is not always the case. still, while you can cognitively come to the realization that you cannot rely on them, that they don't necessarily care for you the same way you do them, it still doesn't erase the hurt or the pain. i know we all have 'those people' in our lives and it is tough for anyone to deal with (be a family member, sibling, close friend, lover, etc.); still for our own sake we must recognize it for what it is when it is happening and yes, allow ourselves time to remorse the end of that relationship as it had been, but not take that pain and swallow it. instead we must look to those positive and fulfilling relationships and use the strength present there to pick ourselves up from the feelings of loss. i am grateful that there are those of the latter relationships in my life, as i believe we all have them no matter how great or few. in the end we must take care of ourselves, nurture the uplifting and steadfast relationships, and let go of the others...we cannot change the actions of others and we most definitely cannot change how they feel.

to be quite honest i'm not really one to stay up on current TV shows; yes, of course i've probably upped my viewing hours trifold (if not more!) the last month or so but even then i usually stick to repeats of my favorites. this would be copious amounts of Seinfeld, some Yes, Dear, King of Queens and the like; throw in some nick at nite and i've gotten my daily recommended values of fart jokes, inane observations, corny puns, and maybe even a sappy moral or two thrown in for good measure. but in terms of shows that are actively running i'm not quite up to speed; i missed the boat on Lost entirely, dropped out of 24 after the first season, and many of the shows i haven't even heard of. but one that is new that i'm enjoying in Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution; in fact it's on right now.

what i really admire is not only jamie's vivacity and willingness to take on the glaring problem, one that is seeming to only get worse despite many great efforts of others, of obesity and how we eat but that he is not daunted by statistics, nay sayers, and even failure. he didn't pick a place to do a food overhaul on that was known for being fit or unhealthy but not completely atrocious; no, he picked a place where there are kids who don't even know how to use a knife and fork, some who don't even know what a vegetable is, and to schools where french fries count as vegetables. he dived right in and set the bar high; high enough that he risked failure and he knew it.

this same attitude i think is what is missing in a lot of places; a person wants to achieve something but they don't think they are capable of it or the road ahead looks too hard and they either abandon the goal altogether or set their sights lower. now, they still may be satisfied when they do get to that lower bar but had they tried to aim higher they may have made that mark; who's to say. and even if they failed they still might have wound up right where they did end up but have come out with something more. they may even have be inspired to continue working until they eventually hit the stars. okay, this does sound a bit too overly rosy, but sometimes i think that because we only live once we might as well find what makes us happy and do all that we can to get there. sure we may fail, we may also find out that what we once thought was our dream has shifted, and that's okay too. but if you are going to go after something do it with gusto and all you have.

i like that jamie doesn't see those people who want him to fail or tear him down as reasons to quit but instead as fuel to his fire. he puts himself out there; states insanely high goals and even if he doesn't believe 100% that he can do it he does his best. i'm taking heed to that and it helps me stay positive. ultimately we never know what that future holds but we can at least do our best to sway it in our direction; and who says we have to ever stop working towards our goals. right up until the end we can be moving forward and i think that is far better than standing still.

fitness and being active has always been something that i grew up around; my earliest memories are no joke cheering my mom on at one race or another (my brother and i only gathered around to watch the finish and before that we were more interested in playing on whatever was nearby that we could turn into a sort of playground) and until i started having slumber parties at my friends' houses i thought everyone's parents got up early and went for a run or worked out. still, even though i grew up around running i had no real desire to pursue it myself; i actually thought it was kind of pointless and would rather play an actual 'game' like soccer. in fact when my mom first suggested i try cross country (after having not been able to make any other team...coordination i do not have!)i thought it was a group of people that traveled. but i was an active kid and i did like getting outside and doing something whether it was a pick-up game of sorts or exploring trails. even though i grew up in the early beginnings of the TV and video game mayhem that has swept the current youth, i think even if given the option to stay indoors 24/7 i would have rather been out playing.

i'm still the same way, if not more so now. i love the feeling after getting in a good sweat; i feel like i've accomplished something. with my injury getting in a workout was at first impossible but now i can do so albeit with limitations. in getting the Krankcycle i am not able to get in some cardio activity but that has really lifted my spirits too. there are plenty of studies showing that exercise is not only good for the body, in fact necessary, but for the mind too. whenever i was hurt before i can attest to getting more glum and moody; i just feel off. fitness has become so much a part of my life that when people ask how i can possible want to run everyday, i tell them it's like brushing my teeth; i just feel dirty or uncomfortable without doing it. this is not the same kind of outlook many people have regarding exercise, and i can admit that my own motivation can wane. this is especially true if i'm doing something that may not be an activity i am used to or particularly enjoy all that much. this has been the case with the Krankcycle; yes i do it because i like being active and doing cadio activity but do i wake up jazzed and excited to do it...no, not really. i do it though because i know i will feel better afterwards (and actually i start feeling better after the first few minutes) and that it is good for me too and is helping with my rehab. i've already seen improvements in my strength and that is encouraging; in fact seeing those gains keeps me motivated to keep at it.

when i do get back running, and i have to believe i will, i want to have come out of this with at least some of my cardio fitness retained and i think i will. i have been able to adapt certain workouts that i've done running to the Krankcycle; interval training can be done on nearly any machine and also tempo like efforts. i will gladly post more details about what i'm doing later if there is interest, but the bottom line is that sometimes motivating oneself to get in a workout can be a bit of an effort at first...but i guarantee that when you stick with it it will become easier and as you improve that feeling is often enough to spur you to actually wanting to get to it! but everyone has those days when getting started may be harder than usual but what helps for me is to picture how good i will feel when i'm done. i also have stocked up my iPod with a nice little pump-up playlist of fast paced songs; that helps me when i'm on the Krank and starting to tire and feel that burn because the music helps take my mind off of that and it usually can make me go faster.

for anyone who may not particularly like exercise or have fallen off the wagon per se, i encourage you to start back up. i'm having to pick a new activity that may not be my first choice but i'm making the best of it, and *gasp* i am in fact staring to maybe, just a bit like it...yes, it's really my only option for now but i'm making the best of it and i feel that i can make it fun by mixing up my workouts that i do on there. and that can apply to you too; of course pick something you enjoy but know that nearly anything can be tweaked to be made more fun and interesting. so let's all get our sweat on and know you'll feel insurmountably much better not only physically but mentally too.

i sit here thinking about how i feel about the man, chris, who hit me. i haven't really paid him much thought, except when people ask or i recount the story, but my feeling is that i would rather spend my energy in the direction of my own recovery. whether he is sentenced to jail time or not because of the court situation whatever happens won't affect my own condition, medical bills and all, and so it doesn't have much of a bearing on how i go about my own healing. i haven't even really thought about what kind of life he leads, if he has a family, or even what kind of a person he is; i feel that any respectful person with a conscious would have stopped. he didn't, and so i feel that i have my answer and i don't necessarily care about learning the details of his own life. i'm sure he's had hardships, we all have, but we can use those as excuses to not take accountability or we can rise to the occasion and let the outcome be what may. he not only fled the scene but stripped his plates so he took measured steps to avoid being identified.

so i have not thought much about him, but today i received a call from the court (of course i got the call one of the few points in the day when i am not an arm's reach from the cell phone! getting around is so slow for me that by the time i hobble back to the phone it has always flipped over to voice mail already.) stating that chris has asked for the judge to reduce his bail amount so that he can get out of jail until his trial. the message informed me that the hearing for this plea will be tomorrow afternoon; chris' current bail stands at $30,000 which means he needs to front $3,000 to be released, a sum he has been unable to gather. so he is then appearing before the judge in the hopes that he can be free of his own prison.

i feel torn; a part of me is admittedly vindictive, "gosh i wish i could give up $3,000 and then be given by normal leg back. i could return back to my old life and go about things that made me happy." if only it was that easy i could shirk not only more surgeries and the grueling and prolonged rehabilitation and be running again but i'd also avoid even more medical bills too. i wish i also could be free of my own sort of prison; while i am thankful for what i still have that does not take away the pain of dealing with what i have lost and may never fully get back. that angry little voice in my head rants, "of course he wants to get out of jail, get back to his life; not having the life you have envisioned or became accustomed too really sucks and having to see freedom and the lives other people lead go on like nothing happened right outside the window, or fence, makes it all the harder. but i have to deal with the same sort of feeling, so why should he get off the hook?"

i feel a bit malevolent wishing misery on another person but i can't pretend that little voice isn't there at all. but another part of me thinks that focusing on chris, and trying to make certain he 'pays his dues' is only wasted energy and effort that could be better placed elsewhere. i've tried to live my life being less judgmental and critical of others or holding onto grudges; i've found that in letting go comes peace of mind on my end and that wishing ill to others isn't a path that leads to any real satisfaction. so i feel torn; yes i do believe what chris did was wrong, i could never imagine abandoning someone like that, but should i just let it go, allow whatever will happen to transpire on its own accord, and continue to leave him a mystery in my own mind? a mystery that i have no intention of investigating because i'd rather put that time and focus into something productive to my own healing and rebuilding my own life.

i left a message back with the court; but have not received a return call and they are closed now. i have no way to go to the hearing, and even if i did i don't have a real urge to go; i really have no desire to see chris again. i saw him as he drove away from me and that was enough. if the court gets in touch with me before his hearing, which is doubtful (i know they have lots to do and i don't think i need to reiterate to all just how slow things can move in governmental places...do you remember your last trip to the DMV?!!?), but i find myself questioning first whether i even really want them to call back and then what i would say. do i foster that niggling angry voice or do i try to let go and move on. i believe in time chris will have to fulfill a sentence, it will most likely end up being reduced, and that should be enough; after all he did not commit a heinous crime like murder or the like so i sometimes feel as if it may be better to have him do community service and at least give back in a way to benefit more people. our prisons are costly and there is only so much room so wouldn't it help a greater amount if he was sentenced to improve the area? i don't know, but at this point i don't think i really care...what happens will happen and all i can do is focus on my own situation. but if i could i would make a plea for a hearing to get my own bail reduced; if i could give any amount of material possessions or money to get back to the life i led i would; but i can't so there is no point in being resentful that i can't and instead be grateful of what i have and take the incremental improvements as they come.

i hope everyone had a great weekend; if you do celebrate Easter than a belated Happy Easter to you, but if not how about a belated Happy Sunday?! ;) i had a pretty good weekend; but then again most everyday seems sort of like the others and they blend together so that i'm not always totally sure exactly which day of the week it is! i'm not a person who usually gets too sappy, sentimental or necessarily lonely during any kind of holiday, i live a decent distance from most of my family that going home all the time just isn't feasible so i've made due with phone calls and going back home for of course the major ones, namely Christmas, but being laid up and amid a silent apartment was a bit tougher than usual. my family at home usually gets together for an Easter brunch and really the only big tradition is that my po-po (for all of you furrowing your brows at that one that means grandma in chinese; oh and for future reference gung-gung means grandpa) makes her special coffee cake. this cake only makes an appearance, albeit a short one before the plates are licked cleaned, for Easter and Christmas. it's a standing joke that if po-po was to come without the coffee cake she wouldn't be let in the door...my dad says that as a joke but there is enough of a serious undertone when he says it that po-po gets the message...hehe.

i of course sent out my little Easter cards and made the phone call rounds but a part of me wished i could be back home and yes, even dorkily hiding plastic eggs around the house. (outside the weather in CA has been about as bad as it has been in OR) i pictured my little bro and sis who now are not so little; my mind thought back to the days in which my little sister needed my help to scout out the eggs and forever i will have that image of the chubby legged cutie in a frilly dress wobbling around with her little basket. the same can be said for my littlest bro who had such wild and crazy hair even as a baby he looked better when it was bicked! but today they are getting so big; my sis is in high school (has way more of a social life than i do even now!) and my bro has gotten bigger and found a way to tame that hair. so i know that the Easter in reality was not played out in the same way as the one in my mind; yes everyone no doubt exchanged hugs, well wishes, and the 'easter bunny' dumped off some few nicely loaded gift baskets but there was no egg dying this year and no egg hunt. of course breakfast included the coffee cake but afterwards i'm sure the little ones were off texting their friends and the adults set to chatting it up.

every year that passes everyone gets a bit older and less excited about the 'childish' traditions; but i still think i'm a little kid inside a big person's body...a body that is a little worse for wear now! because of the big age gap between my two youngest siblings (i was nine when my little sis was born) i spent a great deal of time babysitting and sort of feel like i added a little parental hand to their raising; but now i live far away and each time i go back they've grown so much not only in height but also as people. i'm so very proud of the people they have become and are still evolving into but i am remiss that i have missed the later stages. i think that is why i still picture them as tots and always find myself shocked when i get to see them in person. a lot of people are not lucky enough to really enjoy the company of their siblings (yes we all love them, but sometimes it's tough to like them! haha) but even if we have our spats i not only find myself continually being amazed by them but inspired as well.

as i sit here, i do often think about them and the rest of my family going about their day and sometimes i look at the clock and think, "oh, i bet they're just getting out of school." and i take heart that they love me and care for me, they did send me Easter cards and a treat too!, and they'd love me for just being me. sometimes when things get dark and yes even depressing it's reassuring to know that there are people out there who would take you for who you are, flawed and all (i've certainly got enough of those!), and sometimes care more about you than you do yourself. i hold on to that in hard times, remember that if i question the whole 'why me' or 'why do i even have to be here and be going through this' and it gives me hope and a sense of peace. no matter what happens i'll have those who care and they will give me the energy and strength to make it to tomorrow. we all have those people, even if we aren't actually able to see it at the time; so no matter what goes on and how lost you may feel think about those who care so much about you and try to see yourself through their eyes and in turn love yourself as they would, treat yourself kindly, and don't lose sight of the hope that tomorrow will bring a brighter day.

so from what i gather in watching the news our lovely city or Portland, and the other nearby areas, are getting blasted with some wicked weather. it's really odd feeling sort of disconnected from everything that actually goes on right outside my door, because i'm just not, well, going outside! it feels like i'm sort of at a distance; sure i hear the rain and wind but i'm not out there braving it. not that i'm all too keen on winds that could blow a person over or getting pelted with hail, but i'm not necessarily one to be a house recluse either! however it's a bit easier to stay indoors knowing that outside the weather is crappy...misery loves company right so if i have to suffer at least the rest of the urbanites have to also! i know that come summer and mr. sunshine cracks his face, albeit for a short time, i'll be itching to be out there.

well, my leg will be itching regardless...haha. yes i don't think i've ever been quite so aware of just how many tendons and ligaments comprise that lower extremity, but now that each and every one of them has decided to take on a life of their own and are awakening from their car induced hibernation i'm pretty sure if i had to draw a diagram of just where all these tendons were and how they ran in alignment i'd be dead on! as i do my rehab and wiggle my toes, bend my knee, stretch, and the like i can also feel a myriad of rollings, flexings, contractings, and all that other good stuff; but it really makes my stomach turn. i can actually see some of them too, there are odd bulges and twitches that makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. my leg is still swollen so i'm not ever sure if there are bulges in odd places because of the swelling or because a tendon is misaligned or not put in the 'right place' and then i start to worry that something is wrong. yes, always the extremist; i fear that these tinglings, itchings, and inexplicable sensations are going to be with my the rest of my life. i look back on the days in which everything under the skin functioned like it should and i was happily, ignorantly unaware of all these flexings and such and it was bliss. now i have to intrinsically feel all that goes into moving your toes...and let me tell you it feels weird and unpleasant. i get all these mental pictures of one of those anatomical diagrams and it just doesn't sit well!

but, i am still just trying to think that these sensations, just like the tinglings, are signs that my leg is 'awakening' and healing and that it's a good thing. so i'll keep doing what i'm doing and tell myself that one day, in a far off galaxy and in the far future, my leg will return to being the 'quiet' and pleasant friend i used to know and love and go about its business leaving me none the wiser to its inner workings. :)

well i hope you enjoy the little cartoon i drew up and colored with my new artist tablet. i've been having some fun 'killing time' that way and am getting acquainted to all the varying features there are. i've done a few other cartoons that i've been putting up on my Writer's Blog as well as an online greeting card site. in a related train of thought i've been continuing to work on my novel idea and have set a little daily goal to keep me accountable to keep getting something accomplished!

yes, that Krankcycle sure is a B****! haha...it brings me back to the days when i was in high school and my coach used to have me cross train on the rowing machine. i'm not sure if any of you have been ever so 'blessed' as to spend ample quality time with the rowing machine but to say it is not one of my favorite past times would be an understatement! when i moved up to oregon i thought i'd kissed that sucker good-bye forever; yet in an ironic twist of fate it has come back as the reincarnate of another machine! i jest; a bit. i'd say i have a love/hate relationship with it; i'm grateful to have something to do and a way to help me regain some level of fitness so that hopefully when i do run again i'll be able to get back quicker, but at the same time it's not exactly my first choice! but i'm trying to keep that blasted glass half full, and like i said i'm very happy to be able to get in some limited cardio even if it must come from those burning biceps!

not anything else late breaking to report; i'm relieved that my knee is getting back much more mobility and each day i can bend it just a wee bit more. this makes it much easier to put my splint back on after i air out the leg. what has been really weird, and actually it really scared me at first until i talked to my dad (who majored in exercise science), is that with more feeling in my leg there has also come some uncontrolled spasms. at first they were really painful muscle cramps, but they have downgraded to spontaneous twitches and this unexplainable 'itching' type need to move, flex, and stretch my foot. this happens more at night, and it's centered around my big toe; it seems to have a mind of it's own and wants to move! but the tendons are still broken at the moment and either physically can't move or if they do budge a bit they aren't supposed to yet until the sutures have set longer and it's painful. i also get a tingling all over; so i feel like i've got this leg gone AWOL...but like my dad pointed out lots of nerve endings in addition to the tendons, muscles, skin, and bones were put through a major trauma and are trying to rebuild. the fact that i'm getting more sensation and that the nerves are beginning to fire is a good thing in that it means they are on the road to recovery. so i guess i will accept this rebelling leg and hope that it's just a sign i'm headed in the right direction!

so i'm very excited that i got my new Krankcycle today so that i can do all of my physical therapy here at my apartment...and stop pestering other people to give me a ride! :) i don't know who's happier, them or me, but either way the more i'm learning about this new spin on a traditional UBE machine (basically an arm bike) the more i think it is a step up from what i have been using. there are a lot more varying options with this machine; you can adjust the height of the arm cranks, you can even reverse the motion and steer away from you, and you can opt to cycle in the traditional pedal motion or instead move the arms in a synchronized method to get more power and momentum.

today was my first day using it and i feel you are able to get in a better workout and effort; by the end my heart rate was higher than that on the UBE machine. because the Krankcycle is akin to a spin bike you easily adjust the tension level by the knob and then obviously the harder you go and more rpm's you rack up you can then do interval workouts that way. right now i'm still getting used to relying on my arm muscles to do all the work and definitely need to build up my strength there so i have the ability to get this thing moving along. i'm also still adapting to the machine so i have yet to test out everything yet. but when i do start mixing things up i'll keep you posted; i'm excited to start doing some interval work on there to get in a really good cardio effort. while it is still not running, (and being a runner i'm not used to using my arms this much!) i'm still grateful to be able to do something! so i hope you enjoy meeting my Krankcycle. ;)

The Krankcycle comes from the same man who started the whole spin bike revolution, Johnny G, and you can check out the website at krankcycle.com.

today i had a nice visit from my friend, Tracey, and i must say the company was very welcomed! it's odd how before my accident i could go about my daily schedule and not really feel all that lonely or bored, but i had the distraction of running, working, or going on errands...take all that away and you get a restless mind! and i'm not going to even mention a restless body again. :) i've been slowly getting back to a limited amount of work, but you know how sometimes once you take so much time off getting back into the grind can be even more difficult?! i feel like my brain is turning just as mushy as my muscles, and i've contracted a bad case of laziness..."i don't feel like writing articles. i'd rather obsessively refresh my email account one more time. let's see the latest facebook updates." the excuses to not be productive are never ending, but at the same time growing more alluring too! i've sort of delegated myself to allowing this to be a semi break of indeterminate length and am doing my best to achieve a few daily tasks but not feel too guilty about slacking off.

before my accident it was very rare that i would take a day off, or a break for that matter, so i think this could also be a sign that i just needed to back off and slow down in that department as well. plus, i'm at the point where i want to venture into other things and this could be a good time to do that. i want to finish the novel i'm writing, and i've been plugging away at that daily; not very much but at least enough to feel like i'm moving in the right direction. i also want to focus more on my art and i've been doing that too. so i feel like i'm dabbling in finding what makes me happy work wise and hoping that in the end things will work themselves out. a lot of the future is a question; not only physically with the injury, but financially with the mountain of medical bills piling up and then that is in turn tied to work. so instead of letting all of the unknowns bury me i'm just going to continue to think about today and hope that it all will iron out. so while i am still battling the nagging guilt of slacking off in what now appears to be all aspects of my life, i'm trying to keep it in perspective, believe there is a rhyme and reason for all of this, and just grant myself the liberty to continue to lay low for now. that being said, if anyone is in need of any graphic designs (i know there have to be some people throwing parties and want invitations; someone looking to jazz up their business cards; a tee shirt is just too bare to bear; or you have a hankering to see what you'd look like as a toon!) feel free to hit me up! haha...just kidding. ;)

well, i am proud to announce that there are no more sponge baths for this girl! hehe. well, as of yesterday i have returned to the land of the 'normals' at least in being able to take a shower...i cannot tell you how sweet it was to finally feel clean! don't get me wrong, those little soapy buckets from the hospital and dry shampoos are able to keep most of that BO at bay, but there is something to be said to sitting under a stream of hot water and rubbing in that Pantene! ;) okay, okay, this is not necessarily something of epic importance, but being that i've had to wait for the stitches to first come out and then give the wounds a little more time to heal up before being able to get my legs wet, i must say this was a loooooooooong time coming; it certainly goes to show it is the little things that can be very rewarding once they've been stripped away from you!

maneuvering is still a bit tricky, but i'm getting a better handle on these darn crutches. i have had a nice little streak of i believe over a week now in which i've made it up and down the stairs 'all by myself' when i say that i mean i haven't taken a dive and needed to be caught by a helping hand. although i say that and what happens today as i'm exiting the door of a store on an errand i had to run...yes, i lose my balance and come hurtling towards the ground, pavement no less. i will tell you my heart rate went sky high as soon as those crutches went flying but THANKFULLY the lady holding the door for me was at least able to help break my fall a bit in that i ended up landing more on my bum and good leg and spared the mutilated one. needless to say i think i was getting a bit too comfortable and that acted as a warning that i'm still no pro and need to crutch slowly and carefully...i think what happened is i was trying to juggle my wallet (which i thought was small enough to hold while also holding my crutches, and apparently i was wrong!) and instead of asking someone to help me i just figured i'd deal with it. so for being a dork and not asking for help i took a face plant...lesson learned.

other than that, nothing too new or exciting in the world; i've been starting to do a bit of writing again on the side for work and have continued to work on this new novel idea. i also finally got a Wacom Bamboo digital tablet and have been testing that out with my graphic designs. i've got some new cartoons and perhaps i'll be posting those soon. well, that's all for now, onto another weekend; it's odd how time seems to have entered a weird lull in which the days drag on sooooooooooo slowly but then the weeks have a way of passing; yet at the same time i think back over the past few weeks and it seems like it's been a year...so much for having any bearing on the days/weeks/time frame! hope you all enjoy your weekend and get outside for me too. :)

after i was hit by the car and turned around to watch the driver leave i cannot tell you exactly what went through my mind; but after the shock was the pressing urge to find someone to help me. i remember looking back over my shoulder, still careful to cradle my mangled leg in my arms and support the knee in the hopes that it could successfully be realigned by the doctors, and it was then that i saw a man getting out of a black car. he was the driver immediately behind chris, who had fled the scene, and i couldn't tell what he was doing or if he saw me; i started to flail my one free arm and yelled for help. i saw him see me (i later realized he thought i was dead and he was fishing for his phone to call for help and also wanted to go after the driver who had left) and when he discovered i was still alive and in need of immediate assistance he came running over.

i was seated on the pavement, how i did not wind up landing flat on my back i have no idea, but i was still awkwardly clinging to my knee. he put his arms around me, cradling me like a baby, or a broken doll, and told me i'd be okay. admittedly the first few words out of my mouth were something akin to, "my leg, i'll never be able to run again" but soon another more scary realization came to me and i asked, "am i going to live, am i going to be okay?"

he handled this with composure and reassurance i don't think many people would have had upon looking at my sad little state and he told me that, "yes, you'll be okay." he began to pray at that moment and i closed my eyes and fell into him, letting him support me as the pain started to hit me and i felt like i was losing strength. after that there was what felt like a flood of people, other witnesses, the police officer first to arrive, but i focused only on this man and i asked him what his name was, "John" he replied. i squeezed john's shoulder and looked up at him, trying to block out everything else; he was not only supporting me physically but the rock that kept me sane and calm until the ambulance arrived. i do believe he was the one who very well saved my life.

after being rushed by the ambulance into the ER i was just about to go into surgery when the officer at the scene came to speak to me. i had repeated john's name over and over in my head; i am notoriously horrible at remembering names but this was one i was not willing to forget. i asked the officer to please get john's number so i could later call him and thank him.

i awoke from surgery and one of my first requests was to get in contact with my guardian angel. unfortunately, and there is a story here but one to be saved for a later date, the number was lost and then by the time i got in touch with the officer again he wasn't sure which of the numbers was the man i wanted. i was disheartened at the the thought i may never be able to express my thanks to this incredible man; i thought of the possible ways to get into contact with him. perhaps putting an ad in the newspaper, craigslist, or even seeing if perhaps a local news station might be able to help.

then, out of the blue i got a call on my cell phone. i thought rather logically it would just be another person related to the onslaught of insurance and billing calls i had been amidst, but the person on the other line was in fact john. i couldn't believe it and we both ran through the scene telling our own points of view and expressing how scared we were; one common thread was that we both recognized that through it all we focused only on the other, "it was like i was in a battlefield and you were a wounded solider; i just focused on keeping you together until the ambulance came," he told me.

we both wanted to meet, and being that i wasn't in the kind of shape to really be able to go anywhere i offered for him to come to my apartment; thankfully daddy had cleaned it by that time! :) he asked if it was okay if he brought his family; eerily john's last name is chung and he has a daughter named caitlin, spelled the exact same way, and they recently began running together. i told him i would love to meet his entire family and we set it up for the next day.

i was filled with excitement at the prospect and when i saw this man, this man who saved my life, i was at a loss for words. that, for all who know me, is quite a rarity! i met his wonderful wife, three amazing children, and yes caitlin. they were so very sweet and brought me not only a stuffed monkey and balloon but a beautiful flowering plant too and i have them all set up right where i can see them every day as i camp out on the sofa. as i met each and every one of the chungs i learned about them and their lives and knew i had also found lifelong friends...and i told them what a hero their dad, and husband, was even though he blushed and said it was something anyone would do. but i looked him in the eye and said, "no, it was not what everyone did," referencing chris. and while the numerous people who did stop are a testament to the fact i believe there is more good than bad in this world, the fact is that chris fled and john came to my rescue.

we have exchanged numbers, emails, and the like and i want to go out to some of caitlin's meets as well as the basketball and volleyball games of his younger children when i get better; but most of all i want to stay in contact with the whole family. i have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of support thus far and yet another positive i can take away from this horrible accident is that i have now met an amazing family; and of course my guardian angel.

as i sit here with my leg elevated, propped up rather comically by a pile of pillows and pointed skyward my thoughts are drawn to the other trials and hardships that are facing not only some of my immediate friends and family members, but even the strangers i see on the news. it is easy for us all to get so wound up in our own problems that we kind of block out what is going on around us and we sometimes think we have it 'the worst.' i'm as guilty as the next person; it's easy to get sucked into that downward spiral of self pity, but it's a chasm that doesn't ever have an end and you'll only wind up ruminating over things until you're even more depressed.

in my most recent ordeal i've had plenty of moments where i question 'why me' and think i'm just the most unlucky person around; but the truth is, yes i've been dealt a tough hand but everyone has those cards sooner or later. it may come in the form of a physical hardship, an injury or even birth defect, it could also come in the form of a mental complex be it a neurosis or compulsion, and there are many other forms. in taking a closer look at the people around us, we can see that at any given time one may be suffering in some way to some degree but at the same time there are also positives in their life; be them glaringly obvious or hidden a bit and they need only look a bit harder to find them.

personally, my grandfather had an accident (ironically the same day as my car accident) and he landed himself in the hospital with a trauma to his head. at first he was fighting the system, refusing to eat, to get out of bed, to even talk but it finally took a hardy dose of tough love from a nurse to tell him that he either is going to fight to get better or he'll just end up stuck in the hospital bed he hates so much even longer. thankfully that motivated him and he started to actively participate in getting better, and getting back to life. instead of sitting there stewing about what he can't do or doesn't have at the moment he looked ahead to what he will eventually be able to return to once he overcomes this hurdle.

that can be applied to me, and lots of other problems; we get sucked into the here and now and see the future we want as unobtainable and then sort of give up on it completely. holding onto the hope that we can overcome what we have been faced with now and that we will emerge stronger is perhaps the paramount way to keep plugging away when the going gets seemingly unbearable. and another thing we can take heed to notice is that we are not alone; we all go through rough patches and i think that for the most part human nature is to offer consolation to others when we can because we were met with the same thing in our own times of need.

reaching out not only benefits the person feeling low, but it also rewards the giver. i've been lucky enough to have many wonderful people reach out to me, and at the same time i do what i can to reach out to my own friends and people i meet that may need a hand or even just a friendly smile. when things do seem overwelming i think it helps to take a moment and remember we are never alone, even if it seems like it at times, and also that no matter how far off it looks the future is there...we only need to keep fighting to make it there.

so today was the big day...time to rip out those stitches! yikes...but i've found that sometimes if you build up an event to much in your mind that by the time it actually comes you will most likely be relieved that it isn't as horrible as you might have imagined. well, i'm not going to say it was fun, or a picnic in the park, but i did survive....haha. well, we'll get to the main event in a minute but i started off by first getting another set of xrays. to do that they took off my big cast, and when they took the full thing off the first wave of outside air felt both soothing and slightly painful; it's still an odd sensation i can't quite put into words. the nurse had to pull off some of the cottony gauze that was stuck to the skin and again that was weird. they did the xrays and when dr. cory popped those suckers up on the light board i was able to see all that hardware. but what drew my attention after seeing the two rods and sets of screws was the my tibia was actually broken a second time up more towards mid shin level. "umm, is my bone broken there also?" i asked, i was afraid that i'd have to go back in for more steel or by some crazy fluke they had missed that second fracture and this was the first time it showed up. but he explained that the biggest trauma was of course closer to the ankle and that was the main priority; i guess when compared to what was going on further south that second break wasn't that big of a deal. so dr. cory told me that the bone would heal up fine on it's own. the funny thing is that i had been noticing a strange clicking sort of sound when i straightened my leg and couldn't figure out why...i was afraid it was some tendon gone awry, but the good doc told me that's actually coming from the second bone fracture...huh, good to know! but since the whole area is still partially numb i don't feel any specific pain in the region, so no harm no foul i guess.

they got the skin all cotton free, and i will say it did look like one mr. edward scissorhands gotten ahold of me! at this point my dear friend ron, who actually put in all these fine sutures, stepped in and got down to work. i couldn't look, but ron was great and even joked, "well, the good news is this doesn't hurt me a bit!" i assured him that yes, that was the top priority! ;) because there were so many stitches i think the whole thing took about 20 minutes, but ron was a pro and it wasn't as bad as i had played it out in my mind; but i'm not going to lie in that it was painless...i'll just say i'm glad it's over and leave it at that.

so the good news is that i'm on track and where i should be in terms of what dr. cory expected. i was a bit appalled at how much my calf had atrophied, i have NO calf muscle now...haha...still thankfully some of the swelling around what used to be my calf went down. what scared me also was that my whole ankle and heel is still very swollen, (and i dare say i may even have kankles!) but dr. cory assured me that is to be expected, it did go through some trauma after all, and he said that it will stay swollen most likely for a year. that blew me away, but it also made me feel better in that it's not 'behind schedule' by still being so beautifully yellow. ;)

dr. cory then added a few stretches to my PT routine; i'm now to start stretching my achilles by placing a towel around my foot and pulling the foot towards me, and because i can't actively point my foot down i will start to 'stretch' the upper tendons by just dangling my foot over the edge of a chair. slowly i will regain some muscle control in the upcoming weeks and the next step will be to work on being able to point my foot down and begin flexing it towards me without the towel. it was frustrating when i was staring at the limp foot and willing it to point and flex and the little bugger refused to move! but like i went through that same feeling with not being able to move my big toe much at all, and then progressing to moving it millimeter by millimeter the doc told me it will come in time...so of course it's back to being patient; not one of my strong points, but i'm getting better at it!

overall the visit went well, and i must say my doctors, and my main man ron (i asked him if he ever sewed anything other than skin and he told me he was rather good at fixing socks), are kick a** and i always feel uplifted after seeing them. oh, and now i am in a splint which feels like i've dropped about ten pounds of excess cast weight from my leg, and that's nice; at the same time i feel a bit nervous without the extra protection and feel like the whole area is so exposed. but, since i am now supposed to start airing it out and working on moving the foot, i've got to be able to unwrap those bandages...and so FRANKENLEG must see the light! alright, i'm wiped, so goodnight to all and i hope you all rest easy...do not worry, frankenleg will not haunt your dreams. ;)

well, the visit with my dad, although the poor man was stuck cleaning like crazy and was acting as my glorified butler, was sooooooo great! it was wonderful to have him, and i would be lying if i said the little girl inside (and even the not so little!) wasn't a bit weepy and crying, "i miss my daddy!" But, all good things must come to an end, and at least the last night he wasn't stuck doing too many chores so we were able to enjoy some fine Chipolte (again, yes, when i find something i like i have it again, and again, and again, etc.) and watched the movie 'Yes Man.' i am so grateful that he was able to steal away from the dreaded post office for a few days and that he came all the way out here means so much.

i feel renewed, hopeful, and with a fresh positive outlook. we had some good talks and i'm so touched he came up. and not only because my apartment had the equivalent of a face lift, butt lift, lipo, lip injections, a la Heidi Montague...hehe. just kidding, but it looks amazing. i did a little filming today to save my fingers the job of writing, and i also found a few more videos i shot in the hospital. they were actually filmed exactly a week ago, and it was weird for me to watch them and then see where i am now. even though it was only a week ago it feels like so long ago; it is very odd to remember that then i was getting prepared to undergo another surgery and still sporting that hot hospital gown! anyways, i put two from last sunday up compared to the one i have from today and it was inspiring for me at least in that i've come quite a bit since then. my leg is much less swollen and i have much more movement; so it helps me to see that there is progress, even if it is not going as fast as i would of course like. just like a training log, when you are able to look at where you were and see where you are now, it helps to motivate you to take on the goals set for the future.

Last Sunday Morning

Hanging with Al Pre-Surgery



This Morning